Love this. I love historical fashion and how much can be said with few words (or few fashion choices) in a highly shared culture. We do not live in a highly shared culture. We're very far from Age of Innocence by Edith Wharton, 1870s New York high society, where a man can say one sentence and his fiancee can correctly understand paragraphs from that sentence because they have such a highly shared culture. Because of this lack, today we communicate most widely by the lowest common denominator.
I've been thinking about "pervasive social anxiety caused by lack of etiquette and norms," as I just finish reading Emily Post's Etiquette (1922). There are rules of manners (and dress) in society still, but today we pretend there are no rules and young people get bewildered and feel "judged" when they break an unspoken rule and produce an unexpected reaction in others. I used to have a poster of Brene Brown's quote, "Clear is kind, unclear is unkind" at work next to quotes from popes and saints. When expectations or rules are clear, there is less anxiety about what to do. We're freer within limits than without limits. Without strong banks, a clear flowing river becomes a murky puddle. Many people are living murky puddle lives. And dressing like it!
Thanks Kate, I love the reference to Edith Wharton- it reminds me of so many of the conversations in Dostoyevsky as well. I read Emily Post as a girl and was fascinated by the idea that there is a proper way to act in every setting. I will definitely be addressing this aspect of our clothes in the future!
I agree that practical recommendations are in order, and they will be forthcoming,
but I think the groundwork needs to be laid first to convince people that they should care, that our fashions do affect us and therefore we “ought” to be making choices with care.
Love this. I love historical fashion and how much can be said with few words (or few fashion choices) in a highly shared culture. We do not live in a highly shared culture. We're very far from Age of Innocence by Edith Wharton, 1870s New York high society, where a man can say one sentence and his fiancee can correctly understand paragraphs from that sentence because they have such a highly shared culture. Because of this lack, today we communicate most widely by the lowest common denominator.
I've been thinking about "pervasive social anxiety caused by lack of etiquette and norms," as I just finish reading Emily Post's Etiquette (1922). There are rules of manners (and dress) in society still, but today we pretend there are no rules and young people get bewildered and feel "judged" when they break an unspoken rule and produce an unexpected reaction in others. I used to have a poster of Brene Brown's quote, "Clear is kind, unclear is unkind" at work next to quotes from popes and saints. When expectations or rules are clear, there is less anxiety about what to do. We're freer within limits than without limits. Without strong banks, a clear flowing river becomes a murky puddle. Many people are living murky puddle lives. And dressing like it!
Thanks Kate, I love the reference to Edith Wharton- it reminds me of so many of the conversations in Dostoyevsky as well. I read Emily Post as a girl and was fascinated by the idea that there is a proper way to act in every setting. I will definitely be addressing this aspect of our clothes in the future!
13 years with Anthropologie and now an Orthodox homeschooling SAHM - I’m highly invested 😂
I worked at the Nordstrom flagship for several years too , same trajectory 😮💨
I do very much appreciate the conversation you’re starting here.
I really wanted to love this but I couldn’t get over the amount of “we must,” and “oughts.”
I felt like I was reading St. Paul’s epistle to the Galatians.
I love Catholicism but Catholic culture tends so far towards overbearing, abstract philosophizing.
I’d really like to see more practical, realistic recommendations and less “we must” language.
Hi Marcellino, I appreciate the feedback.
I agree that practical recommendations are in order, and they will be forthcoming,
but I think the groundwork needs to be laid first to convince people that they should care, that our fashions do affect us and therefore we “ought” to be making choices with care.